6.30.2003 :::
 
A review of the journal I kept during high school has revived old feelings and memories. I so clearly remember the sublime joy and hope I felt over Dana crumble into sorrow and confusion. I remember the bitterness of exclusion, the emptiness as even my close friends began drifting away. The fervor with which I threw myself into my pilot training, desperate to escape the graveyard of my dreams. Lonely walks along the neighborhood sidewalks late at night, my bare feet getting wet from the sprinklers. It's all so vivid, as though it only happened last week.

Oddly enough, however, the tears hiding behind my eyes, brought to life by these memories, are not tears of bitterness. The sorrow is sweet in my heart, a gentle promise of the life to come. I can't help but look forward to everything my future at CSU holds, both the joy and pain. It is time for me to be truly alive again.

::: posted by Peter at 02:20