9.21.2003 :::
 
I'm feeling myself slip into a chronometric paradox. Each day seems like years, but weeks like minutes. Thinking back to a specific event only three days ago feels like digging through decades of old memories. Yet, when I think about having been in college an entire month already, it seems no time at all has passed. I suppose it's a reactionary coping method, but I'm saddened to think of all the experiences and feelings I've inadvertently glazed over.

I fear my heart's eager anticipation may once again be disappointed. The prospect of finding a girl seems much more intimidating now that Caitlin has been effectively removed from consideration. All my energy was focused on her, and I don't know where to go from here. No other girls have made a visible effort to befriend me save Jennifer from Seminar, and she also has a boyfriend. Becca's insistence notwithstanding, I certainly don't see girls flocking to me. One possibility is they are simply too shy, as I am. The other (which I, in my infinite self-pessimism, find more likely) is they simply aren't interested in the quiet guy with hobbit hair and a laptop. Every pore of my being cries "geek," and to freshman girls attempting to rediscover their place in a new environment, such a thing is most likely an aversion.

::: posted by Peter at 00:29